The TV (: Televisio) is located at the player's house in the Kesselinperä area, and in jail. There are two programs which can be seen on the TV; the Topless Gun action movie and the music video for the song Marjatta (which can also be heard on the in-game radio). These programs are on the air from 10:00 to 22:00 each weekday. Every weekend during the rally sprint race broadcast of the race will be shown during the run time showing each of the rally cars.
The TV can also be used to browse Teletext pages by using the TV remote control that can be found on the coffee table in front of the TV, or on the table in jail.
Peeing on the TV will result in the player's death from electrocution.
Leaving the TV on for extended periods of time can cause a house fire.
Programs[]
The programs on the television are limited to two "shows": Topless Gun, and a music video for Marjatta. A test pattern is displayed during the late-night hours.
Topless Gun[]
The name of the first program, "Topless Gun", is a reference to the developer's Steam and YouTube name, which is ToplessGun. The show is a parody of both Top Gun and possibly Airwolf. The song Taksi mies by Jörkka Sten, which also plays on the radio, plays in the background of the video.
Marjatta[]
The second program is a music video for the song Marjatta which can be heard on the in-game radio. The videos will loop after the music video has ended.
Rally broadcast[]
Every weekend, while the rally sprint race is taking place, the broadcast will be able to watch at the TV. It will show rally cars driving around, with the name of the driver, from the view of few static cameras, placed all around the map (they cannot be seen). It will also show a dashcam view for each car, with speed included. The rally results are also available to be seen on Teletext on page 250. When a car ends the stage, the "scoreboard" will appear. When the rally race ends, the current car just disappears, and another programme shows up.
Broadcast break[]
From 22:00 to 10:00 there is a broadcast break, which shows a test pattern and plays calm piano music known as Klassinen1. Looking directly at the test pattern of the TV at home increases fatigue, which is helpful for going back to sleep if the player has woken up in the middle of the night. Watching the test pattern on the prison TV, however, doesn't increase player's fatigue at all. When the test pattern is on for around 5 minutes, the sounds of chirping birds can be heard. You can listen to it here. and here
Teletext[]
The TV can also be used to browse VK-Teksti-TV Teletext pages. This can be done by pressing F
while looking at the TV remote control when the television is on. The main use of the Teletext service is to check the current and upcoming weather.
Pages[]
The Teletext service has several pages that can be accessed by using the remote control. Each page is three digits long, and the numbers must be entered by looking at the remote control and pressing the number keys on the keyboard (0
- 9
). For example, looking at the remote control when the Teletext overlay is on the TV screen and pressing the 1
, 0
and 0
keys in succession will bring the main page (page 100) on the screen.
There are currently 18 different pages available to be browsed in six categories: news, sports, weather, lottery, culture, and free time. All of the pages are written in Finnish, but most of them do not contain useful information:
Main page | 100 | |
---|---|---|
Uutiset | (news) | 101 |
Kotimaa | (national) | 102 |
Ulkomaat | (international) | 130 |
Talous | (economics) | 160 |
Sää | (weather) | 180 |
Koko Suomi | (entire Finland) | 181 |
Paikallissää | (local weather) | 188 |
Varoitukset | (warnings) | 190 |
Urheilu | (sports) | 200 |
Urheilusähkeet | (sports telegrams) | 201 |
Palloilutulokset | (sports results) | 240 |
Moottoriurheilu | (rally results) | 250 |
Lotto | (lottery) | 300 |
Lauantai-lotto | (Saturday lottery) | 301 |
Kulttuuri | (culture) | 400 |
Kulttuuriuutisia | (culture news) | 401 |
Vapaa-aika | (free time) | 500 |
Ruokavinkki arkeen | (everyday cooking tip) | 501 |
Päivän mietelause | (aphorism of the day) | 502 |
News[]
The news section comprises three pages which all contain humorous "news":
National news:
KAYKYLA'S MURDER INVESTIGATION COVER
There has been a surprising turn in the investigation into the homicide that took place in the village. According to police chief Yli-Tempula, no crime has taken place. "The confession of the act was smashed. The witness of the act was also smashed. The supposed victim was only rarely smashed. It seems that some of the researchers were also smashed." clarifies Yli-Tempula.
MAKELI'S EXECUTIVE OFFICER WAS REMOVED
The Agricultural Development Association is dismissing its executive director Asko Alisukeva due to an opinion writing court. Aliskukeva wrote things on the bulletin board of the Ylivetelä municipal hall that cannot be mentioned in this connection. According to police, there is nothing to see on the bulletin board.
"SHOULD PEOPLE BE TAXED?"
Biologist Usko Kasvisto wonders the position of the taxpayer. According to the flora, it is questionable to tax a plant from growing because the plant cannot influence its own growth. "What about people, then, should people be taxed for growing up?" According to the flora, there can be no session in the state that arbitrarily decides on biosphere rights.
THE SUGAR BEET HARVEST IS SMALL
The Confederation of Sugar Beet Producers warns of a poor beet harvest. Sugar beets are growing slowly and will be smaller than expected. The harvest has been taxed by the Finnish state.
RECORD NUMBER OF UNEMPLOYED
The economic downturn and the collapse of Soviet trade have driven tens of thousands of people into unemployment services. Marita von Schitte, a vanity strategist at the hypothesis think tank, understands the difficult employment situation, but advises the unemployed: "Go to work"
RUSSIAN ASSASSIN ARRESTED
The tax administration notified the Russian assassin when he applied for dual Finnish citizenship but had not paid enough taxes. “Otherwise, we wouldn’t have cared like a shit about him, but when he was wrong about these tax issues,” says tax bear K. Ontio
International News:
ESTONIAN WAR IS UNNECESSARY
The threat of war that has raised tensions for a day has been withdrawn. Estonia threatened both Finland and Russia with war if they did not agree to the demands. The demands could never be heard, and it was a momentary excess of Estonian Minister of Defense Kuimo Allin after the car sales that went wrong.
NEWS CORRECTION
The news that a duck had been found abroad, and that no one knew where the duck had come from and where the duck was going, was a news duck. We apologize for the error.
THE OIL COMPANY DOES NOT BELIEVE IN THE PERFORMANCE
Norway's leading oil company believes that the oil field found in the car park of the Stockholm shopping center is not commercially exploitable. The company justifies its position on the grounds that the deposit originates from a stationary car.
ITALY PROSECUTES NEW ZEALAND
The Italian Parliament is demanding compensation from New Zealand for copying. In the background is a find showing the state of New Zealand copying the well-known boot shape of the Italian territory. The State of New Zealand replies that this is not a copy as the area is a mirror image and is split into a sea area. The dispute is going to a UN court.
Economics:
ECONOMIC INITIATIVE LEGISLATIVE FAILED
A bill that would make it easier for companies to hire employees and grow more profitable, thereby improving the Finnish economy, has been unanimous. "We are not here to make things easier. Yes, the hardest part is to be done. It has always been done.", says Minister of Finance Aina Samanlainen.
AGREEMENT WITH THE COMMUNISTS
The state is making an agreement with the Communists that would benefit both the capitalists and the Communists. Under the agreement, the Communists would receive a salary but would pay 100% of their salaries back to the state in the form of taxes. The only opponent is the tax administration, which says that the fun of tax collection will end if it is so easily agreed to.
HOCKEY HISTORY TEAM LISTED?
In hockey circles, there is a rumor that the championship team would be listed on the stock exchange. The well-known influencer, who remains anonymous, commented: "Now it would be a good seam to list in the championship drugstore. I think small investors in particular would be eager to be on the move and flipped.
Weather[]
The weather section comprises three pages related to weather: the first one is an unhelpful national weather report, the second one is a local weather report, and the last one is a weather warning page.
The paikallissää (local weather) page, 188, contains the only useful information on the Teletext service. It displays the current weather type around Alivieska and shows the current position of the rain clouds. As with the rest of the Teletext service, the weather section is also in Finnish, including the weather types:
In-game | Translated |
---|---|
Sää nyt | Current weather |
Ennuste | Forecast |
PILVISTÄ | Cloudy |
SELKEÄÄ | Clear |
UKKOSTA | Thunder |
VESISADETTA | Rainfall |
Sports[]
Similarly to the news section, the sports section comprises a sports telegram page as well as a sports results page.
Sports telegrams:
SPRINT IS AGAIN IN ALIVIESKA
The Peräjärvi Summer Sprint, which has already become a tradition, will be run again next weekend. The competition is run in the Finnish Championships and amateur classes. The incident has been squandered in the past about inadequate security measures, but organizer Leif Fleetari promises they will be fine: "When you drive then you drive at full capacity. Sometimes there are mistakes and then you go a little quieter."
THE STONE IS NOT WANTED
World champion and four-time Main Series gold medalist Raitti Vakone knocks out KiVes' participation: "The Finnish residue has become a gentleman's game. For a hard collar, decide arbitrarily who will play in the main series.The first team will move to the foreign law series when Suomes play to play yard actress.
TAKKINEN DRIVED INTO THE WALL IN ITALY
The cabriolet driver Mako Takkinen drove to the wall in Italian time. Takkinen survived without injury, but the car was completely destroyed. The wall was not there yet yesterday, and so far it is not known who put it in it.
Culture[]
Similarly to the news and sports sections, the culture section comprises a single humorous culture news page:
A NEW UNKNOWN SOLDIER IN PROGRESS
Director Jake Aumakatto reveals a new Soldier of the Unknown in progress. The gable roof opens up that in a new version, the identity of an unknown soldier is finally revealed. The film is set to move into the production phase as soon as the soldier’s identity first becomes clear.
THE ARTIST MADE A SINGLE LIST RECORD
The Finnish artist set a new single list record after registering with every club search service in Finland at the same time.
ARTIST GRANTS TO KELA DISTRICT?
The Ministry of Culture is proposing a change to the scholarship system. In the new mill, grants would be linked to the current labor market support system. Instead of marking "unemployed" in an unemployment benefit application, artists would use the term "artist."
Free time[]
The final section comprises two pages: the first is a cooking page which contains some questionable recipes, and the other is a page that contains an aphorism.
Trivia[]
- "VK" and "Oy Valtionkanava AB" ("The State Channel, Inc.") is a reference to Yle, in 1990s known as Yleisradio ("The Public Radio"); a public broadcaster nowadays also known as the Finnish Broadcasting Corporation. In remote regions, Yleisradio over-the-air TV channels were the only ones to have any presence until the 1990s. The test pattern also matches the one used by Yleisradio until they implemented 24h overnight text-screen news broadcasting. Yle operates the Teletext service even to this day, even when some other European broadcasters (such as the BBC) have shut their service down.
- Everytime you turn on the TV in Jail, its remote control respawns on the table.
- You cannot get tired from watching the test screen on the Jail TV.
- If you turn on one of the televisions, the other will turn on too, but will not play sound.
- The "local weather" page of the Teletext service shows three other towns/cities of Alivieska: Raittimaa, Lukka, and Alivieska; as well as a third, larger lake to the southwest.
- The cooking recipes pay homage to the Finnish YouTuber Niilo22, who has – amongst other dishes – made oatmeal with rye bread and cheese in his videos.
- "Eiheki-keitto", "Eiheki-soup" is a direct reference to one of his cooking videos "Ei hekille", the title being a misspelling of "Ei herkille", literally meaning "Not for the faint of heart"
- When you watch the test picture after 22:00 you get tired much faster.
- In older versions of the game, the TV was different from what we have now.
- The only programme was the test pattern with no sound. Its current music, Klassinen, played at 2 am on the radio instead.
- And even earlier, when the TV was first introduced, it showed a still frame of what seems to be a TV news broadcast from the 90's.