- A transcript page for this article can be found here.
Barely anything is known of Teimo's past, but according to his stories he has had a dog, he has a wife called Irma, he was a fisherman and he used to be a wrestler of some kind in his youth.
Teimo is likely in his later 40s or early 50s. He speaks with a dialect from Savonia and is very calm and easy-going, but showing him the middle finger, peeing into his face or smashing his shop or pub window will anger him. Breaking the window will also make the player unable to do further shopping until the 2,760 mk sum on the cash register is paid.
Once the store has been entered from the main door, he will usually greet the player by saying "Katos päevää! No mitteepä laetetaan?" ("Well hello! What would you like to have?") or "Hyvvee päevee ja tervetulloo Teimon kaappaan" ("Good day and welcome to Teimo's Shop"). After some time, Teimo will often tell some kind of hilarious story. One example is when he says how modern (that is, the mid-'90s) music is really bad and that they won't play anything good on the radio anymore. He also says that he likes the Marjatta song also seen on the TV in the player's home.
Teimo's banal rambling does have utility, however. He's the the one who'll bring up the ability to unplug the telephone to protect against idiot callers in the night and hint at how bug repellent can be piled on to extend the effect's duration. His knowing wink-nudge about the town youths hoarding all of the sugar and yeast is also the only in-game mention that the player can start doing the same, if they haven't already found the brewing bucket and have connected the dots themselves. A few stories are more like historical references to the upspiraling fuel prices and the newly re-introduced car tax stickers in the mid-90s.
Teimo will call the player when products ordered via the magazine are delivered to the store. He also calls the player if they haven't paid for the fuel, and claims they'll end up in prison. Sometimes he even says he'll have to talk with the player's father when he returns. If the player does the finger gesture, he will tell the player to go home.
- Main article: Teimo/Transcript
- "Good day!"
- "508... 509... Well hello! What can I do for you?"
- "Thank you and so long!"
- "Very beautiful finger you got there. Really, I am not kidding."
- "Hey to the dishes and dishes to the dishwasher!"
- "I am about to close the store, so shake that booty little faster."
- "Yeah yeah, and now add some butter in between."
- "Wha... I... Th... Piss... Yo... Damn punk peeing... Oh my god what is this, you get out of here now!"
- "Welcome to the Teim... Oh it's you."
- "Well good day, what brings you to the city?"
- "Oh my god... Adult man peeing all over the place. My store is not a toilet."
- "Smell a pussy!"
- "Fuck off you little punk!"
- "Throw yourself up on the hill, you little punk."
- "Marjattaaaaaaa...... You used to carry light to me..."
- "What would you like? Golden brown Nivalan Kalia together with the horrible day after ramifications?"
- "For such young punk, you are quite a man when it comes to drinking."
- "I assume this is your last drink, right?"
- "Sooo... It seems like you are starting to drink for the third leg as well."
- "I wonder if I am committing a crime here serving you."
- "You really are a bottomless hole."
- "I know you've stolen fuel. Come back and pay!"
- "Your post-order has arrived. You can pick it up from the store."
- The voice actor who voices Teimo also voices Marko Kahjo and the strawberry guy.
- Teimo's surname, Pielinen, was made up by the voice actor who voices Teimo.
- The surname, Pielinen was revealed later in Simo Kauppinen's podcast to be an accident. The developer, Johannes Rojola said that he wanted to give another surname than "Pielinen" to Teimo. But when Simo was asked about the name on Reddit before Johannes had time to decide it, he had to quickly come up with something. When "Pielinen" was revealed by Simo to be the name, it was quickly canonized and after that Johannes couldn't change the name anymore. After this Johannes said to Simo that "In the winter game we don't do the same mistake anymore".
- Sometimes, Teimo may get knocked off his bike while traveling to and from his house or near the store by bus, Jani, or Petteri. He is unable to die from this but will be knocked out. Once he is knocked out, Teimo will be unable to work at the store and the pub until the player saves and reloads the game.
- In Finland there's a real shop, that looks just like Teimo's shop. Permanently closed "Sepon Kauppa" is located in Satakunta, Finland. The shop and the gas station are both almost identical.
- In one of his lines of dialogue, Teimo eludes to having taken part in the Suvi-Sprint, implying that he must be at least a competent driver and has some interest in racing or tuning.